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Q: Have you ever seen a black person on the jet sons?
A: NO, Looks like a good future doesn’t it?

Q: How do you start a black parade?
A: Roll a 40 down street.

Q: How long does it take a black lady to shit?
A: Bout 9 months.

Q: What do you call a black priest?
A: Holy shit.

Q: what do you do when you’re sitting in the dark and your TV starts to float?
A: You turn on the lights and shoot the black people stealing it.

At a cocktail party, one woman said to another, ‘Aren’t you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger? The other replied, ‘Yes, I am, I married the wrong man.’

My wife’s jealousy is getting ridiculous. The other day she looked at my calendar and wanted to know who may was.

I never know how much of what I say is true. ‘Bette Midler’

A man inserted an ‘ad’ in the classifieds: ‘wife wanted’. Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: ‘you can have mine’.

When men steal your life, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.

The only thing worse than a man you can’t control is a man you can.

Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.

There is no reciprocity. Men love women, women love children, children love hamsters.

It’s the good girls who keep diaries; the bad girls never have the time.

Never, under any circumstances, combine a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

If you had to specify, in one word, why the human race has not, and will never achieve its full potential, that word would be meetings.

It is a fine line between “ hobby” and mental illness”

People who push to share their religious views with you rarely care to have you to share yours with them.

Nobody cares if you can’t dance, just dance.

Regardless of the temptation, don’t lick a steak knife.

Q; what do you call a school bus full of black people?
A: A rotten banana.

Q: What do you do if you see a black man flopping around on the ground?
A: stop laughing and reload

Q: What does the BFI on the dumpster’s stand for?
A: black family inside

Q: What happens when you stick your hand in a jar of jelly beans?
A: the black one steals your watch

Q: why are black people like jelly beans?
A: No one likes the black ones.